What to do when they think its your fault.

So, you have an officer, and he/she is unhappy with how you are managing the guild. They express their concerns and voice their opinions. Now what….

Well, lets look at some possible alternative scenarios:
Officer:
“WTF! YOU SUCK! I HATE YOU!”
GM:
“Goodbye.” /gkick

Officer: “WTF! This isn’t working. None of this works, this is broken, that is broken, this  makes everyone mad, and that is not getting us anywhere.”
GM:
“Ok, how do you propose we fix it? What are your alternatives and solutions to the issues you are raising? Do you have a plan, course of action, perhaps an inkling of an idea on HOW to fix these ‘problems’”
Officer:
“No! That’s what the GM does, you fix it.”
GM:
“But I do not see these things as issues beyond people growing up and putting on the big-boy panties. Wiping is a part of raiding, loot not dropping is a part of raiding, mix ‘n’ matching the raid group and swapping and subbing people in/out is a part of raiding. I can’t change these things outright; but I am open to new and creative ways to accomplish the same goals. Do you have any suggestions on what we can do differently?”
Officer:
“No! You suck.”
GM:
“Goodbye.” /gkick

Officer: “hey, I wanted to talk about a few things that have come to my attention. I had some discussions with various raid members and they have some feedback and criticism I’d like to bring to you for consideration.”
GM:
“Good, let’s get it on the table and see if we can address some of them, or at the very least agree upon a unified response to the concerns.”
Officer:
“Ok, here they are….”

The discussion continues with a good debate regarding the positives and negatives of any possible changes or solutions, the impact of said changes on the guild and raid, as well as the implications of future changes (always be mindful of setting precedence).

GM: “Hey, thanks for bring this to me; glad we could discuss this before anyone blows up or causes a drama storm for no reason.”
Officer:
“Yeah, me too. I hope you know we appreciate as a guild what your doing for us and we all know this can be a thankless job…so, thanks.”
GM:
“No need to ever thank me. I do it because I want to help all of us in one form or fashion. And honestly…you guys in the officer corp make it possible. Without you, I couldn’t do a thing.”

There are certainly more than these 3 scenarios, but they are the simplest and I think make up the 3 main “emotional” situations we all face. I have said over and over to officers, raiders, and social guild members alike…”Do not gripe and complain solely for the sake of complaining. If you have issues or problems, then bring solutions and ideas to the table. I am ALWAYS open to alternative points of view and courses of action. Be polite, be respectful, and be open-minded.” If you come at me with something petty and trivial, be prepared to face harsh criticism on my part. Nothing grates or irks me more than whining and complaining that does nothing but stir up drama. I have kicked people and had them leave for this very issue. Do I regret the ultimate resolution – NO. Do I wish an alternative course could have been taken – YES. I would have preferred a civil discourse, and sometimes that conversation has happened and the offender continues to just bemoan their situation, well, then bemoan elsewhere.

Its never going to be perfect, and the grass is not always greener on the other side. The issue is you don’t know what the other side looks like until you go there, and often times we settle in and live with the imperfect situation telling ourselves, “Better the devil you know…”

One should always self reflect…

  • Am I doing my best here to help?
  • Have I been playing my character to the best of my abilities?
  • Have I helped others who I see faltering?
  • Am I part of the problem?
  • Can I be part of the solution?

It is far easier to point at someone and blame them…its far more rewarding to shepherd in solutions to the problems in hand.

Q

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